The MUSHIEST Valentine's Day Post EVER.

Lordy, be! It's February 14th, the DAY OF LISTS!

Definitions:

Melhousin = twelve degrees above the equator
Grapes = flesh and meat compressed into dainty little houses
Lemniscate = is a polar curve whose most common form is the locus of points the product of whose distances from two fixed points
Skraler = *not defined*
Scolos = my favorite variety of non-existance




Uh, 100 small things... go!

pickles
small dogs
rice cakes
crumbles of rice cakes
the color green-blue (not blue-green, that is wrong.)
my telephone hypnotist
bottlecaps
sugar
lights reflected in my window
the volume of a spaceship under the water
hats (for snakes)
topping charts
mice-skates

Uracil
rose petals, finely ground and stored in Adenosine-5'-triphosphate bottles
Tim Roche
small dogs
fire hydrants
a 64th note
cash
water, when stepped upon...
...water when not stepped upon
piping
a sweet gaucho
nachos passed through a sonic defibrillator
electons with smilie faces painted on them
Scolos
lint
Something About Pirate's fanbase
ƒ, is ƒ=1.0x10^-6

Nazi Germany twelve years ago
lougen moustache
breathing
small dogs
feather parts
my plants, yes, all of them
the length of time it takes to melt Herbocores
$1.72
Sunday afternoon
The hight of a lemniscate if alpha is less than one
your house's floor space relative to the surface area of the moon
barks
bites

small dogs
smoke
the distance from my eyeball to my pituitary gland
the distance from New Jersey to the center of the earth
the distance from the nearest weasel to your jugular vein
Adam Smith's left leg (Yes, the one who wrote that book.)
the dot on the three-hundred and thirty fourth page of my Calculus text
noodles, after being ruthlessly attacked by an attack hammer
plaster
earwigs
a Brain Leech that took $10 from him every turn
Mr. T's tolerance level for jibba-jabba
the absorbancy of pure, distilled water
licorice in hydrophosporic acid

the amount of time you would live after ingesting a spoonful of cicutol
tabula rasa (don't even call me on this one - I'll win.)
the average rainfall in Winnipeg, Canada over the course of one year
the average rainfall on Io, the moon of Jupiter, over the course of twenty-eight years
the length of Marty-lemur's tail rings, beginning at the third to last ring

a space bar
the amount of bars actually in outer space
the time needed for a group of six tasmanian devils to reduce a road-killed wombat into a small collection of skin and flesh
(....oh, wait)
one over the noise that the partiers manage to make at 3:00 in the morning whenever Joe is gone for the weekend
the amount of noise from my guitar needed to make the 705 pound up on my floor at 11:03 PM
Kooklos
the average IQ of anyone willing to purchase a ticket to a Good Charlotte show
magic, when used properly (!!!!)
The amount of time I can go without picking my nose
geometric sequences

pens?
the mass of the earth's hologram
the smell of a hamburger
small dogs
napkins
small dogs
earmuffs
the angle of incedence for the RED BARON'S AIRCRAFT
coolness points awarded for use of "leet speak" (generally neglegable)
uvulai
squid's love for each other
squid's inability to ruthlessly capture and destroy their prey rapidly and effectively (my bad, redundant)
SCOOTER the WONDER BOWEL!
the diameter of one of Trey Anastasio's high-E strings
milk in a seive
milk not in a seive, but happily laughing and playing with it's friends
The Limit Comparison Test (and his dogs)
The number of people who didn't go and dig up their treasure last saturday because it magically appeared for three hours (WHAT!?!? YOU DIDN'T!?!!?!)

The overall quality of scotch and potato chips when mixed together and left to sit for several hours

The marginal benefit of eating that next Cheezit
The number of words I can pronounce in Icelandic
My overall appreciaton of the combination of the words "zit" and "cheese" to produce the name of a fine food product
The approximate number of times I have spelled "pie" incorrectly in my lifetime (look, I can't remember when I was little.) 90

Corn Flakes
Evan Mowry's crunchiness factor
colonoscopy
the careful blending of spices and fruit to create that miasma you are wafting
the length of a bluegrass song (in minutes) divided by the number of individual notes played in said song
not the amount of time needed to think of 100 small things
my turtle friends (Marly and Carly)
the inverse of my love for gumdrops
the coefficient of kinetic friction for air (at v=5 m/s)

this feeling right...

....now. (Yes, small, but oh-so-sweet.)

That is so mushy I am going to soil myself! Holy crap!

•¶•